Suicide
Monday Ministerial Musings
By Rev. Mark William Ennis
2024 Blog #02
January 13, 2025
Suicide
I received word through our classis clerk last week that a ministerial colleague had a family crisis. His brother had killed himself. When my colleague and his sister went to the brother’s apartment, they were kept out by the police. Things were too “messy” for the family to be allowed in. Now, a few days later, my colleague and his sister are speaking to one another as they wonder what they could have done differently and wondering what, if anything, they could have done to have a different outcome.
I don’t condemn anyone who commits suicide. I don’t know what such people are feeling or what situations these folks are in. Such things are not for me to evaluate. What I do know is the pain, the guilt and the anger of those who experience the suicide of a friend, loved-one, or even an acquaintance. Suicide leaves a scar on those who are left behind. I can identify with the feelings of sadness, anger and doubt from those people who have experienced friends killing themselves. I feel those very same things.
During the summer of 1980 my Godfather killed himself. It was a summer that should have been only a joy-filled one. I had just finished college, I had gotten engaged to be married, and I would be starting seminary in the fall. I got busy with life and had not been in contact with him as much as I once had. I minimized his depression and his alcohol binges. Now, more than forty years later, I wish that I had not minimized these things and had visited him more. I still feel guilty because of this.
I hope that my friend and his sister are not going down this road into guilt. The fact is that if someone has decided to commit suicide, they will find a way. There are many ways to do it, and a determined person will find a way.
I write this to reach out to those who are depressed, hopeless and feel that circumstances can never change. Please reach out for help. Talk to a therapist, a member of the clergy, a friend. Suicide might seem like the only way out of your hopelessness, but it causes harm to those around you. Every suicide hurts the people who love you the most. Despite how you are feeling, please don’t hurt those around you by hurting yourself.
It might be hard for you to believe that others care about you, but there is at least one person who will grieve if you kill yourself. Please don’t do that to that other person. For the sake of others, if you are having such feelings, please get help. Below is the suicide hotline number. If you are considering self-harm, please call and don’t do something that we cause hurt to others.
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